Friday, 4 July 2008

The Big Matthew Wilson Question!

That is the big question about Matthew Wilson - not the question about big Matthew Wilson for those of you already confused.

The Sock believes that we need to clear up this question as to whether Matthew should be referred to as Heathcliff or Darcy in future. In the event that Wilson becomes Britain's Next Top Gardener we are going to be stuck with the name for years! Plus there is the matter of the tribute song.

The Sock is coming out in favour of Heathcliff. Whilst Heathcliff of the Hedgerows is a pretty stupid moniker it is better than Darcy of the Dingly Dells? Also Matthew's hair is too unruly to be Darcyesque and the Sock can't see him lounging around parlours taking tea and making polite conversation. Darcy wasn't big on the sense of humour front - although come to think of it, Heathcliff wasn't exactly a laugh a minute either.

Readers wishing to post their arguments in favour of one or the other are welcome. Ditherers may wish to wait and see which argument sways them. Feel free to come up with another suitable name and if it seems right it will be added to the poll.


Fat Rascal said...

I was leaning towards Darcy as the big advantage he has over Heathcliff is intelligence. He was able to speak and not merely brood - a bit of brooding is OK and I can see how certain areas of Berryfields could bring it on.

I then thought of another candidate -Mr Rochester! He could do the gruff and earthy but was also a bit of a lad and would scrub up for polite society.

The musical options are endless -C'mon baby light my fire, Burn baby burn etc.

Arabella Sock said...

Oh yes, I can see Matthew Rochester!
He has almost certainly got a mad wife locked up in the attic too.

Crusty Bedsocks said...

Most definately Darcy - all wet shirt and leather riding boots!

Certainly NOT Heathcliffe ( him and Cathy were Ye Olde Sharon and Dennis Watts in Stenders!)

Hmmm...Possibly Rochester.... needs thinking about.

Pork Chop said...

Rochester is a good suggestion although not as easy to find a feem toon as Heathcliff. I'll throw another suggestion into the pot as we seem to be going for literary figures. How about Mellors, Lady Chatterley's lover?

Fat Rascal said...

Mellors, Pork Chop???
Do you know something about Matthew that we don't?

Crusty - think where Rochester is, and think where Matthew comes from - it was meant!

Besides which, that leaves Colin Firth to be forever Darcy -which, sadly for his acting career, he is!

Crusty Bedsocks said...

He can't be Rochester as he ended up blind and it would be tricky pruning roses etc.. Darcy it is then!

Arabella Sock said...

Rochester didn't go blind until the end of the book so we can probably get a few GW seasons out of Matthew before worrying about that.

I almost wish I hadn't voted for Heathcliff now - 'Rochester of the Rock Gardens' its got a fine ring to it and I love rock gardens because I love rocks. A new rock garden at Berryfields would be just the thing.

The Black Finger Nail said...

He's not Heathcliff, Darcy or Rochester....he's the Messiah!

All hail the Messiah!

Pork Chop said...

Well you see Fat Rascal, Mellors was an earthy sort of character and very manly, not a fop like Darcy, and therefore more fitting to Matthew's persona.

You never know either, with those rugged good looks, he may well have "friends" in high places!

Arabella Sock said...

Oh no - I'm not going to be able to stop myself...

He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!

(Groan.. sorry everyone..)

James A-S said...

All this talk of Mr Darcy and Heathcliff is all rather sickening. Just because he has lots of hair and a windswept far away look doesn't make it any easier for the rest of us, you know. I have already pointed out the obvious fact that he has cloven hooves and a tattoo of S Club Seven across his manly buttocks but it makes little difference to all this fawning.
Mind you he is the spit image of John Hallam in Catherine Cookson's The Mallen Trilogy.
(Quite why I remember this television series, I do not know. I faintly recall watching it in the afternoon so I was either unwell or worse for wear.)

emmat said...

james A-S you are so naughty I honestly nearly just fell off my chair laughing at that picture. I will never be able to stop calling him Matteus - or sometimes Darce like if i want him to get me some chips or something.

I say we should all be forced to sing the Matthew Passion.

The truth is that MW just has some sort of unbottleable manliness that makes everyone swoon, which just goes to prove his song should be

and nothing else

emmat said...

But PS in defence of the Hat:

I have absolutely no doubt and would be prepare to wager real money that JAS is quite good on the dancefloor, and that MW isn't.

I reckon I know this because MW once confessed (I remember) to having liked the Cure.


(the anti-dancing just confirms the Darcy vote though doesn't it.)

tinker said...

I can't believe none of you have noticed that there is more than a hint of lovejoy in there as well...

how did that theme tune go??

principally st trivia said...

Heathcliff (formerly) of Harlow Carr has my vote every time.
Heathcliff of Creative Gardens Development doesn't have quite the same ring, though.

Arabella Sock said...

James you mustn't feel jealous of Matthew and to be honest the manly buttock image will have put most people off him. Actually it's not been a good week for love-idols as Garden Monkey's talk of Chris Beardshaw "pissing on his chips" has rather tainted the saint for me.

Anyway, back to you James and researchers at Team Sock have found you a theme tune sung by some buxom wenches

emmat said...

I LOVE that song. I love any song which involves the mention of willow, but that is particularly cute.

And I LOVE americans, whatever i said about Kate and her cutlasses. Listen to them getting ye english folksong and giving it that jaunty beat and twangy pronunciation. And they are all so pretty and fresh-faced. I swear they left all the unhealthy short people behind when they went to found the City on a Hill.

And for another thing, where on earth are they doing it? Medievasneyland? Will they have an ox roast later?

We must definitely sing it. Veep is the expert on harmonising, I nominate her to organise.

Crusty Bedsocks said...

LOL! He hasn't got the Mallen streak though! ( that was one of my mums favorite TV series back then!)

Another LOL as I am finding myself pondering about the tattoo - would it be the name S Club 7 or their picture???

I can also imagine JAS struting his funky stuff on the dance floor (brilliant feem toon by the way)with Darcy Wilson scowling leaning on the bar!

emmat said...

My family have got a Mallen streak... I don't think it's very glamorous in my case so I dye it out. I don't know. You'd think it would be super cool but actually it just looks like a mess.

James A-S said...

The tattoo is a still from their video of Reach For The Sky. It took a team of highly qualified Harley Street tattooists 17 hours to complete. The process was rumoured to be painful although Matthew took his mind off the agony by reading back copies of The Hornet and chewing Pontefract cakes.

VP said...

All together now:

Lah! (Soprano)
Laaah! (Alto)
Laaahhhhhh! (Tenor)
Loooooooowwww! (Bass)

Same time next week everyone?