Monday, 8 September 2008

Now is the winter of my discontent....

But dear reader there is no need to be sad!! You too can look forward to winter with a brand new hot water bottle from the Sea of Immeasurable Gravy's new product range.

All bottles are made from naturalish and ethicallyish sourced products mostly located within 15 or so miles of YOU!

Top of the range bottles made in best quality faux fur are

The Silver Sublime is the Roll's Royce of our hot water bottles. Classy, witty, smart and totally delectable you will all want to take this one to bed with you!!

The best things come in little packages and our Chocolate dream is no exception! Charming, soft and emminently strokeable you will want to cuddle this tiny bottle close to your heart.

Unfortunately the Big Huggy hot water bottle is no longer available.

The Budget Range

Redhead in Bed is our new arty hot-water bottle - absolutely geeooooooooooooorgeous!!!

It's a wrap! For those of you with slightly fishy tastes and plastic fetishes.

The Novelty Range

First up we have Pink Piggy - not to everyone's tastes - press this one on the nose and it squeals "Choo Choo" or "Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee"

Duckella - this is no duck to float in your bath. Take it to bed and it gently emits a smell of roses all night! Quack! Quack!

Oh dear! How did that get in it's disgraceful. Somebody at the SOIM will be sacked for this!


emmat said...

Our local camping shop in Cornwall used to do a end-of-summer sale where the slogan was "now is the season of our discount Tents"

Pork Chop said...

I love most of the merchandise on offer, but must protest in the strongest of terms to the Pink Piggy water bottle. It's in the worst possible taste! Harrumph!

Arabella Sock said...

Oops! Sorry Pork Chop - the piggy pink is definitely offensive. Never mind it is old stock and we'll put it in the clearance bucket.

JamesA-S said...

Is "oh Dear" John Cushnie?

HappyMouffetard said...

Oh, James, I'll now never, ever be able to listen to Gardener's Question Time again without feeling sick and slightly dirty...

granro said...

I would like to place an order for the jamesa-s one, please!

I think it needs its own little hat where the stopper goes, though.

Can you please do a Toby, too?

VP said...

To appease pork chop, you could rebrand the Pink Piggy as a whoopee cushion instead!

Arabella Sock said...

Sorry Granro you can't have one. They were a limited edition and Fat Rascal took the last five! She said it gets very cold up her mountain in winter but I'm not convinced that is the real reason! Also I had originally intended my cats to have a Big Huggy each but as that is no longer available they had to have Silver Sublimes too.

Astonishingly once it was pointed out that the "Oh Dear" might be John Cushnie there was a run on those as well.

There are still quite a few "It's a Wrap" left - perhaps they've been targetted at the wrong market.

VP - Euwwwww!

granro said...

On second thoughts, don't do a 'toby'.

I can never remember what he looks like unless I picture him with little horns and furry legs.

Arabella Sock said...

I am happy not to remember what Toby looks like and I'm delaying the moment I have to start working with him which is coming only too soon.

Fat Rascal said...

I don't know who John Cushnie is, but I think I'd recognise him if I saw him now.